Do you and your spouse ever argue in front of your kids?
You know, sometimes it may seem like your kids never listen to you, but they do. They may not like what they hear, but they’re listening to you.
And when you’re arguing with your spouse in front of your kids, they’re always listening. This is when they REALLY take in what you have to say.
Dr. Jon W. Jacobs, M.D., says:
Children start by being frightened by their parents arguing. Later, they become disgusted. ‘How can they live like this?’ they wonder. Eventually, they develop a fear of being similarly trapped, and as adults may have the tendency to bail out of relationships early.
Interestingly, Dr. Carol Ummel Lindquist, Ph.D., says that occasional “heated negotiations” can actually be a good thing for kids, as long as both you and your spouse remain respectful towards each other.
“If you bully one another, your kids learn to bully others,” warns Lindquist. “And they will turn that treatment right back on you once they are teenagers.”
Yep. By watching and listening to how you treat your partner when you’re stressed and upset, they’re learning how to treat you.
So here’s a great tip for keeping your arguments under control…
Argue as if a stranger (like your neighbor) is watching you and listening to you.
This means keeping the arguments civilized by using your voices low.
As always, keep your kids in mind. Remember, they hate the arguments just as much (if not more) than you do.
Do you and your spouse argue often? How has that affected your family (your kids, especially)? Do you argue in front of them, or do you wait until they’re not around? Share your stories in the comments below.
The Dangers Of Arguing In Front Of Your Kids [Family]
