Education Blog

How To Get Sleep When Baby Won’t Sleep

October 11, 2021

A new mom recently emailed me with a concern about her baby’s sleep schedule. I enjoy it when people ask me about my sleep habits. The most difficult aspect of parenting is getting your baby or toddler to sleep through the night. It’s a well-researched topic, so you’ll find plenty of materials to guide you. What do you wish to know, dear reader? The following is a request:

In a few months, my husband and I will be expecting our first kid. We are performing study to find out what to expect over the coming year. There are many suggestions for ‘Rooming-in’ by a number of people. Keep a bassinet close to the cot for rapid feedings and for keeping an eye on the baby.

Parents Who’ve Been There also suggest that you split the night into different shifts and move the active’ parent’s station from the nursery to feed the baby and change diapers. This seems like a wise decision, since I’m a Cranky Hell beast if I don’t get enough sleep.

I understand that sleep loss is unavoidable, but the shift technique, which guarantees a 4-hour sleep block, has already proven beneficial to me. What’s the point of picking only one? Or should we hold out until Babe shows up and see what happens? We’d love to know what you think about the health advantages and drawbacks of each technique.


The city of Seattle is starting to feel drowsy.

What’s the best place for the baby to sleep?

Much depends on the baby’s proximity to you during night. In the first few months of your kid’s existence, how much work, ease, or sleep you get depends on how near your baby is to you and how worried you are for their safety.

There are some parents who like to sleep with their infant in the same bed as them. This is a contentious practice since the infant has a change of blanking or pillows tangling. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) have a strong discouragement against bed-sharing

People who prefer to share a bed make an effort to follow the American Academy of Pediatrics’ safe sleeping guidelines. The use of solid mattress without pillows or blankets and the baby’s positioning on its back. For the sake of children’s protection, only one parent will be home when they go to sleep at night. Parents who are high on drugs or alcohol will have trouble sleeping.

Couples who want to sleep farther apart can utilise co-sleeping bed extensions, which attach to a mattress. By using these co-sleeping bed extensions, parents can give their newborns their own resting space while yet keeping them close by in case they need a night feed. The baby is not huddled between the bodies of his or her parents or hidden under blankets when they share a bed.

Does Having the Baby Farther Away Help Getting Sleep?

The eager interrogator is now staring farther away. You have the option of sleeping in the same room as your baby if he or she is in a bassinet, or in a separate nursery. Infants should sleep with their parents for at least the first six months of their lives, if possible for the first year. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) encourages this. According to AAP research, the risk of SIDS death is cut in half when babies share a room.

This may be sufficient to persuade some parents to let their child sleep in their room while they sleep. Our parents-to-be have brought up a slew of critical and timely topics. I address everyone of them by name.

  • Easy Feeding: A few steps, a breast in the child’s mouth, and some walking down the corridor are all it takes to feed a child rather than one giant step. There are varying degrees of difficulty and inconvenience associated with these additional steps. During the need of bottle’s preparation, the convenience is nearly completely lost. A mother must be exclusively breastfeeding in order to give her child breast milk. Whether or not the infant is in the room, dads will find it no more easy to breastfeed their baby at night using breastmilk and a pump.
  • Keep an eye on them: Sharing a room with a baby makes it simple to keep an eye on them. Just wander over to the bassinet to see how a room-sharing baby is doing. Afterwards, you’ll be able to listen for their small breaths while focusing your eyes in the dim light. If they’re weeping, fussing, or acting strangely, it’s easy to spot. For the sole purpose of keeping tabs on the faraway infant, you’ll need baby monitoring equipment.
  • There are numerous companies that provide services for monitoring your child. Socks and diapers that monitor your baby’s heart rate, respiration, and blood oxygen levels are among the smart wearables now available.

Problem with Smart Monitors

Claims about smart monitors being flawless are untrue. No national regulator ensures the accuracy of data collected by smart monitors. There would be no way to regulate the monitors if they were offered as medical products. Independent testing and FDA approval would be required if the devices were marketed as medical devices.

They haven’t been approved yet, so parents shouldn’t rely on them while making medical decisions for their children. They should only be used as a source of lighthearted entertainment while not being taken seriously. It’s possible to use a smart monitor to provide entertainment for your youngster by displaying their heart rate and breathing patterns. Smart monitors have not been proven to prevent SIDS deaths in children.

This proves that sharing a room is safer than staying alone. What impact does this have on a parent’s capacity to raise their children?

How to Get a Good Night’s Sleep on Your Own?

One of my favourite sleep specialists is Boston Children’s Hospital Sleep Center nurse practitioner Maile Moore. The last time we chatted, she taught me a few valuable lessons about newborn sleep that have stuck with me ever since.

  1. Day and night are the same thing to newborns. Even newborns can keep track of the 24-hour clock and know when to go to sleep and get up.
  1. The sleep pattern of a baby is completely unpredictable. Up until the age of 4 months, infants sleep for 45 minutes at a time with wakeful transitions. Yes, you read that correctly. 45 minutes have passed since the beginning of the video.

The combination of these two truths might send parents into a fit of anxiety. As a result, here is what happened: The infant wakes up from his 45-minute nap wailing. A parent steps in to comfort or feed their child when they see their youngster in distress. Once the youngster is used to the parental intervention, he or she will drift off to sleep.

As a result, we’re caught in a vicious cycle. Both parents and baby suffer as a result of the infant’s inability to get enough sleep.

Any room sharing arrangement necessitates two types of parental behaviour. It is the responsibility of parents to see to it that their children get enough sleep. Before going to bed, turn off all screens and dim or turn off all lights at least an hour before. It’s imperative that the room is completely dark. A fan or white noise should be present in the space.

Infants’ cries should be tolerated by parents, too. Allowing the infant to rest for a time before replying to their cries is uncomfortable, but it is well worth the effort. Self-soothing takes time for babies to learn. When a baby’s fussiness turns into full-blown sobbing, or if the baby is in pain, parents can step in to help. By the time they’re three to four months old, babies should be able to regulate their sleep cycles and have enough to last the night.

What About Teamwork For Getting Sleep?

Couples should split the nighttime labour in a way that makes sense. The solution to nighttime issues does not lie in the division of labour. Others like to divide infant interventions into pre- and post-midnight shifts, trading their night feedings and interventions one for one. The division of night shifts might be into days for some persons. Weekends off for moms are possible.

What the pair decides is dependent on the baby’s feeding method and their own schedule. A smart suggestion for parents is to talk about the division before their child is born. Our questioner was on the ball, and we salute him for it. A healthy, well-fed baby depends on open, honest communication, and everyone should have the chance to do so.

In fact, even if the infant is exclusively breastfed, fathers can still be a big assistance. However, dads can help by making sure that breastfeeding stations (a table, chair, and lamp) are clean, as well as providing refreshments, blankets, and reading material for the moms who are having difficulties sleeping. While the baby is napping, they can keep them awake and relieve mom of part of her caregiving duties.

The key to success here is teamwork. Pump-expressed milk and bottle feedings might provide dads a reprieve by splitting the night in half. This not only allows both parents to have more restful sleep, but it also gives dad a chance to snuggle and care for his child, which improves his oxytocin levels and strengthens his bond with his child.

The Final Answer

You’ll be awake no matter how much you sleep. Despite this, I prefer to adhere to the AAP’s guidelines. You and your child may want to think about sharing a room. There is a good chance of success if you let your child develop self-soothing and proper sleep hygiene.